Recap Roundup: Top Chef DC Episode 6

Richard Nixon, the Cuban Missle Crisis, and duck balls: what do they all have in common? Why, Top Chef, of course!

David Dust on not really feeling the guest judge: "I guess I can’t completely explain it, but if Michelle Bernstein and I were in a nightclub, I would SOOOOOO “accidentally” spill my drink on her lame Charter Club dress while busting my moves on the dance floor. Trust."

Jordan Baker foregoes the haiku!: "Look, she was a bitch who spent at least two episodes talking about wanting to kill a competitor, and worse yet, she was holier than thou about everyone else’s attitude and despiteall this, SOMEHOW, she still managed to be boring as shit. No haiku for her."

Minx Eats on the surprising winner: "I thought it was surprising for Kevin to be on top without Alpha holding his hand so I figured Tiffany would win this. But no - I was wrong. Kevin is declared the winner and given a bonus prize - 6 nights in Hawaii including air fare. Nice."

Cliffieland gets caught up in the puns: "He says he doesn't and hasn't. And wasn't aware that they are really duck testicles. That's nuts. Sorry, I couldn't resist. It just quacked me up. OK, now I know that was painful. Like getting smacked in the duck nuggets. I'll stop now."

Gawker on Angelo's Quickfire experiment: "Angelo grabs duck testicles—and for once does not describe them as 'sexy'—to make a marshmallow."

Omnivore explores the Andrea/Michelle backstory: "Andrea says she and Bernstein rose through the ranks together as rookie chefs, but her own mommy-track detour cost her momentum in Miami’s food scene. Another explanation could be that Bernstein is internationally-trained and adventurous, while Andrea has never traveled outside of the United States and crafted a menu that includes a 'Hangover Burger'."

Reality Check (Baltimore Sun) on strategy: "Stephen admits he's thinking about clearing some 'breathing space' by voting for elimination some of the chefs who suck up all the air in the room. He's looking at you Angelo. And you Kenny."

My Monkey Could Do That on the "drama": "Previously on 'Top Chef': The producers, desperate for another ratings goldmine like Leah and Hosea, focus on various couples flirting with each other, or at least where one person is flirting and the other one isn’t outright laughing at them. At least I assume Leah and Hosea was a ratings goldmine. Drama usually is. Too bad none of it involves Amanda, who totally looks like Leah."

Reality TV Magazine on Quickfire winners: "The best dishes were Tamesha who cooked duck tongue perfectly, Amanda whose llama was delicious per Michelle….not really sure how delicious llama can be but hey what do I know. And Kelly who took the emu eggs and turned them into a sophisticated and delicious omelet was also in the top three."

Best Week Ever explains exactly how TC is like the Cold War: "The chefs talk behind each others’ backs a lot (like the Cold War!) and Russian spies are everywhere (also like it!) and Tamesha decides she might have to strangle Amanda (like that time someone probably got strangled in the Cold War!)"

Serious Eats on the emu: "Amanda was assigned emu eggs by default. 'I'm assuming they're very hard to get into,' she said. As it turns out, emu eggs and Yale University have more in common than we all originally thought."

Tablet on the USS Sequoia: "They’re cruising on the U.S.S. Sequoia, the onetime presidential boat on which Kennedy held meetings during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Which makes sense: As everyone knew at the time, if the Soviets ever bombed, you were either to duck and cover or sit on a boat in the Potomac River, and you would be miraculously saved."

Onion AV Club summarizes my concerns, too: "To me, one of the great distinctions of Top Chef—and Project Runway and other like-minded reality-competition shows—is that it’s a meritocracy. Chefs can talk all they want about psyching out their opponents or how they’re not there to make friends, but at the end of the day (to borrow my least favorite of ubiquitous reality-show expressions), what they put on the plate determines whether they stay or go. Naturally, I was a little alarmed by an Elimination challenge that asked contestants to judge contestants, because that sounded like something those other reality shows would do, not this one."

Hollywood.com has a theory: "Michelle looks exactly like Andrea, and in fact, they know each other! This does nothing to debunk my theory that there exists an underground network of white girls who look exactly the same and who all secretly know each other. "

Speakeasy (WSJ) on foie: "How is foie gras in any way an obscure protein? When foie gras is so overexposed that it’s not uncommon to see it on floating by on trays at ritzy society parties, why is it included as part of a group of 'nasty proteins'?"

Meal Ticket (Philly City Paper) on Ed's experience: "'I’ve used duck balls before,' deadpans Ed, detailing a cock’s comb-and-testes 'cock and balls soup' he put together when working for Todd 'I Look Like Gaston' English. Ed, hands-on experience with balls is one area where I think it’s OK to concede alpha-male dominance to another dude."

Max the Girl with more on strategy: "Meanwhile, Angelo is using the 'S' word again: Strategy. 'I keep on changing my strategy,' he says. 'Keep striving for more.' Dude, this isn’t Survivor. Shouldn’t your strategy be, like, cooking really, really well?"

What'ere, Jane Eyre on recent current events: "I don't know if it's the recent Russian-agents-living-among-us-and-trying-to-garner-secrets-by-being-suburbanites story that feeds the undercurrent of shifty goings-on in this episode, or if everyone really is being this sneaky."