Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Recap Roundup: Top Chef All Stars Episode 3

Minxeats on the Quickfire: "For the Quickfire Challenge, our numerous re-cheftestants have to team up and compete in a relay race, but not just any relay race! Yes, it is a three-legged race, complete with burlap bags and rope! No, only kidding - but wouldn't that have been fun? Imagine Fabio and Marcel as partners...or Marcel and just about anyone."

Jordan Baker is no longer enchanted by Fabio: "Fabio is baffled by the idea of cooking French and Vietnamese food, but Fabio being baffled by the prospect of making something other than Italian is nothing new, and since I no longer find him thoroughly charming, I can’t be bothered to pound out each laborious syllable of his comments."

Monkeys as Critics on Antonia: "I love that Antonia and Jamie are on the same team. Maybe Antonia can cut herself and wrap the wound in duct tape, just to show us how it’s done. But what really kills me is that Antonia doesn’t know how to peel more than one garlic clove at a time. I’m not a professional chef and even I know that you smash ‘em. I have lost all respect for Antonia, honestly. That’s just a special level of dumb."

Fork in the Road on Stephen: "After dinner, Stephen informed us that fashion 'has become a MAJOR obsession of mine, but it could be cocaine or heroin, so it could always be worse.' And that's so true, because with Stephen, it could always be worse."

Max the Girl on Carla: "Back in the kitchen, Carla, who doesn’t like anything fancy or newfangled, is standing over a cauldron of liquid nitrogen, looking like some sort of culinary Wicca. She’s going to really need to evoke the Power of the Hootie if she’s going to pull this one off."

Reality TV Calendar on the Quickfire: "All teams now have 15 minutes to complete their mis en place and prepare one amazing dish using the ingredients they just prepped. If a team is still prepping when the clock starts, oh well, tough tomatoes."

What'ere Jane Eyre on Too Many Cheftestants: "Even though each individual elimination is momentous in an All-Star season, there are still an awful lot of people running around the Kitchen. So, in order to get this season done before Easter, there's a double elimination tonight."

Cliffieland breaks down the teams and their assigned restaurants: "Angelo, Fabio, EverExpandingDoucheyMike and Tiffany get David Chang's French-Vietnamese Má Pêche. Richard, Spike, Stephen, and Tre go to Chef Michael White's Italian-themed Marea (Italian for 'tide,' Spanish for 'it annoys' or 'it makes me dizzy/seasick'). Carla, Dale T., Marcel, and Tiffani head off to Chef Wylie Dufresne's molecular gastronomy-and-chest-to-neck-whiskers-themed wd~50. Antonia, Casey, Dale L., and Jamie get Chef David Burke's Townhouse, a 'New American' dining experience."

Carol Blymire on Angelo: "After being greeted at Má Pêche by David Chang in chef whites (hot!), Angelo becomes "that guy" about the food. You know the type: the socially retarded guy with culinary verbal diarrhea who over-analyzes and talks about every single ingredient, technique and nuance as he's eating something. It's clearly giving Tiffany D. the stabby thoughts."

Best Week Ever on Bourdain's critique of Stephen's dish: "Stephen was certainly the favorite to get voted off coming into this episode, and that became even more apparent after Bourdain said his food “tasted like a head shop.” Like nothing Bourdain has ever said, I don’t entirely grasp this critique; some would argue that pot tastes delicious, though if you’re arguing that the food tasted like glass and metal instruments for smoking said pot, then it’d clearly be terrible, but also huh?"

My Monkey Could Do That on Padma's powers of observation: " The red team (Antonia, Casey, Jamie, and DaleL) get a greeting of “Hello, ladies” from Padma, as DaleL slowly raises his hand in the back."

Creative Loafing on the luck of the draw: "Angelo thought he was lucky for getting to cook Chang’s cuisine and Stephen thought he had it made getting to cook at Marea. Meanwhile, the chefs who had to cook the wacky and/or molecular gastronomy delights at WD-50 and Townhouse thought they were screwed (and they kind of were, I think)."

Procrastiblog's stray thought of the week: "Angelo: If an Italian thinks your pants are too tight, your pants are too tight."

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