Monday, May 23, 2011

Recap Roundup - Top Chef Masters 3 Episode 7

A Just Recompense on the Quickfire: "Mary Sue doesn’t feel like she’s tasting anything without smell. Hugh says his ears are jamming as he chews. They taste all five ingredients; the trays are removed, and they have to write down what the ingredients were. Traci points out that remembering five things adds to the difficulty. I agree. This seems pretty poorly designed; I think they should’ve done them one at a time like they have done in simple blind tasting challenges. I don’t understand why they didn’t, in fact. The hearing thing is kind of bogus, anyway. What, hearing yourself swallow worcestershire sauce is going to give it away? Rig the headphones so they can hear Curtis give instructions (which, it’s hilarious, at the end he says, 'Ok, take off your headphones' and they all do so on cue). Maybe I’m just grumpy, but this could’ve been very cool if I hadn’t been so distracted by nonsense."

Reality TV Calendar is judgmental: "Next test is smell. Blindfolds and ear muffs and sniffing only. They are working on some sort of cheese, hot sauce, root beer, rice vinegar and mayonnaise. Traci is out. This one concerns me. The smell of root beer is distinctive. Someone smelled the capsicum in the hot sauce. I hope they gave her the point because that is what the smell is. If you are a chef you should be able to identify many cheeses by smell and distinguish types of vinegar. I can’t, but I’m not a chef. And, frankly, does mayonnaise have a smell? Egg yolk, oil and some acid. It’s going to depend on the oil and the acid as to what it smells like? Homemade versus Best Foods? Yikes. Silly."

Clean Plate Charlie on the happy couple: "The cheftestants will have to make a dish based on Chris and his fiancée Victoria's life story (you're kidding, right). Chris says that he and Victoria were friends first. Their favorite moment was seeing a movie marquee that said j'taime. Then he gave Victoria a bracelet that said j'taime. They also like beer, hockey and pretzels. By the way, by the pictures he's passing around, Victoria looks smoking hot and Chris looks like Bill Gates."

Monkeys as Critics on the romantic couple: "Chris and Victoria’s special phrase is Je t’aime. Because it’s a rare and wonderful phrase often found on pretentious coffee mugs. Hugh wants to puke. I’m with Hugh. Chris and Victoria have to get a beer and a pretzel while watching sporting events. Chris is shaping up to be a total bore, so I’m hoping Victoria is equally dull. Victoria introduced Chris to sushi. She cooked him salmon and he thought it was chicken. Naomi thinks Chris might be a massive dumbass. I’m with Naomi. They’ve never had shellfish (or they never order it when they go out, Chris kind of mutters this part). Chris and Victoria sound like the most boring people ever. How did they get onto 'Top Chef Masters' anyway? Was there a casting call for people who think McDonald’s is fine dining? Apparently the chefs now have to make raw French food with bracelets. Or something."

Oregon Live on the non-twist: "Stone pops into the kitchen, and the chefs' hearts collectively sink. It's 'Top Chef' twist time! What will it be this week? They have to complete their cooking wearing wedding veils, perhaps? Turns out, there's no twist at all. When their meal is served, Stone says, the mothers of the young lovers will be watching on closed-circuit television. Uh, OK ... who really cares?"

TWOP on post-prandial possiblities: "Curtis and Gail take their mind off the food to speculate over how many couples in the room will be 'getting some action tonight.' They even joke about Oseland's chances with his tablemate. Lest we get skeeved out, it's apparent that Gael Greene deems Oseland's chewing 'ot attractive, not seductive.' Lest ye feel gipped, we get a vignette about Gael Greene's one-night stand with Elvis, after which he beckoned her to order him a fried egg sandwich. Ahhhh, romance!"

AV Club on working the theme: "The three chefs who dedicated the most time to including clever tie-ins based on Chris’ stories were Hugh, Celina and Traci; Of course, they also ended up being the bottom three. You could tell that Hugh was particularly frustrated with this: He felt he had done exactly what they asked for, and was frustrated to find himself in the bottom three because of it. Celina, meanwhile, felt like she had made two things that were meaningful to the couple and two things that the judges seemed to legitimately like. Traci thought she had made a delicious apple tart which captured the romantic sentiment of that final moment (although writing “Je T’aime” on a plate is not exactly creative cookery)."

Grub Street on give the guy a chance!: "Suddenly Curtis stands up and steals Chris’s thunder to announce that Chris has an announcement to make. He proposes, she says yes, and they make out on the floor a little bit. Looking on, Naomi and James weep uncontrollably. It feels like the episode should end here, but someone still needs to get kicked off."

Posted on

No comments: